Q: How Can I Convince My Mom to Let Me Choose My Senior Portrait Photographer?

posted in: Photography | 4

I’m soooo excited to have my senior portraits done; all my senior friends’ pictures turned out so amazing! I need help though. I want to choose my own photographer, but my mom wants me to use the one she used ages ago… And that totally is not what I want. His style is boring and stiff… I want casual and fun. What can I do to convince my mom we should go to someone like you for my senior pictures?

— Just a Junior

My answer this question has several parts, so stick with me, ok? First of all, in order to convince your mom, (or even to have a chance of getting her to change her mind), you need to talk with her. And when you do, make sure you keep things cool. While this decision means a lot to you, you’ll need to be mature about the discussion to show her that you are capable of making decisions as a mature person (trust me, this is probably very important from your mom’s perspective). So, before you talk with your mom, read the rest of my response so that you can share your feelings with your mom in a way she’s more likely to understand.

First of all, do you know if there are any specific reasons why your mom wants to use her old photographer? Knowing her concerns and reasons will help you be able to answer her questions and make her feel better about the whole situation. Without know exactly what it is, I can only provide some more general suggestions. So, make sure you find out her reasons before you start giving yours!

Your mom probably wants that one formal senior portrait. Are you willing to make a compromise if she lets you choose your senior portrait photographer? In other words, if she really wants the formal outfit and formal pose to remember your senior year — it might go a long way to offer to do this in addition to the fun, casual senior portrait session that you’re looking forward to. Actually, a lot of my senior clients often do something similar — either before or after the “fun” part of the senior session, we take a little time to do the formal senior portrait. And, since it’s not the only thing we do, you and your mom get to enjoy a variety of styles, all of which are great portraits of you.

Your mom may have concerns about using a different photographer for your senior portraits because she wants to make sure both of you will enjoy your senior portraits. This is a completely valid concern — and you want to make sure you have a good experience too, don’t you? So, since you mentioned that you like my style, let’s say you are telling her about Betsy’s Photography. You can mention the style of senior portraits that I create (remember, I can do those formal ones too), and you definitely want to mention some of my qualifications. Your mom will probably feel a lot better about considering another photographer if she knows the “new” one is properly qualified. In fact, send her to my website — she’ll be able to read all the details there.

Ok, so after addressing your mom’s concerns and telling her why you want to have Betsy’s Photography create your senior portrait, what’s the next step? Well, first make sure her main objections have been answered (keeping things calm, remember?). Then, if she’s still not completely convinced, maybe you should suggest visiting my website, giving the studio a call, or even scheduling a consultation to discuss your senior portrait choices.

It’s important that you and your mom to both be happy with the photographer you use for your senior portraits, and by finding out what the real concerns are, you have a better chance of helping your mom consider other photographer when it comes time to schedule your senior portrait session. Keep cool, discuss things calmly, and present supporting points. Don’t try tell your mom she’s wrong (she’s entitled to her own opinion!), but ask her if she’d be willing to consider hearing you out. A little information never hurt anyone, right?

Who knows, maybe when you’ve finished discussing everything, your mom will be the first one to contact me about scheduling your senior portrait session!

4 Responses

  1. Super Mom
    |

    This is good advice. It’s always better to listen to your teen discuss things maturely — I hope things work out.

  2. Cynical
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    I’m not so sure this would work. My mom wouldn’t fall for that…

  3. A
    |

    Hi “Cynical”, I really think it depends on the situation and how the subject is mentioned. Some might be more reluctant to listen, true, but you definitely have a better chance if you present a good solid argument 🙂

  4. anonymous
    |

    a good solid approach to this difficult subject, in my opinion. parents often get frustrated because their teens aren’t utilizing their “adult” conversation skills, but at the same time, they want adult treatment. Yes, I think a senior deserves input in their senior pictures, but since the parent is often the one with the checkbook, it’s going to have to be an “adult” discussion regarding the choice of photographer.

    I’d have your mom look at the website of the photographer you’re considering, or if you have a friend who’s used this photographer for their senior pictures, tell your mom to talk to her mom. Sometimes moms do a pretty good job of convincing each other — and also it can help to relieve any fears your mom might have about this “new” photographer.